"Well, it's a depression. It's a depression for millions of Americans, through no fault of their own." – Vice President Joe Biden (Fox News, Tuesday)

"The very same entities that are lobbying today to limit the effectiveness of a new regulatory reform are the people who in 2000 and 1999 deregulated these markets entirely." – Former federal financial regulator Brooksley Born, who was thwarted in the 1990s in her effort to expand government oversight to derivatives markets, which contributed to the recent crash (PBS' "Frontline," Tuesday)

"There are so many different variables. They might not know where their mother and daddy are. They might be homeless. Everything else is on their mind, and not learning." – DISD principal Mari Smith, on why about half of the system's fifth-graders aren't ready for middle school (The Dallas Morning News, Thursday)

"I knew this day would come. I knew you guys would show up." – Stewart Nozette, a top U.S. government scientist, speaking gleefully to an undercover FBI agent he thought was an Israeli spy recruiter; Nozette has been charged with attempted espionage (Jerusalem Post, Tuesday)

"They couldn't re-enter their bodies because they were dead." – Beverly Bunn, a Texas orthodontist reacting angrily to a New Age channeler's suggestion that those who died in a sweat lodge ritual in which Dr. Bunn participated chose not to return to their bodies because they were having too much fun (The New York Times, Thursday)

"If I stood and seemed comfortable in my kitchen, it's natural. It's my kitchen." – Eric Williamson, Virginia man arrested for indecent exposure after a neighbor cutting across his yard spied him inside his house making coffee in the buff (WTOP-AM, Thursday)

"My children are all gone. It's just Diego and I. I miss him horribly." – Judie Simmons, 70, a Plano woman whose runaway terrier Diego was allegedly adopted through an animal shelter by an Allen family that won't give him back (WFAA Channel 8, Tuesday)

"Heene believes the world is going to end in 2012. Because of that, he wanted to make money quickly, become rich enough to build a bunker or something underground, where he can be safe from the sun exploding." – Linda Lee, lawyer for former associate of Balloon Boy dad Richard Heene, who is believed by police to have orchestrated hoax (The Associated Press, Wednesday)

"Just ring the doorbell and say 'I'm supposed to be flying in there, but my dad said to stay in the box for the show!' – you are practically guaranteed to get double and triple Halloween treats." – advertisement for Balloon Boy Halloween Costume Kit (Microflight.com, Thursday)

"Sexy nun costumes, or dressing up as Jesus is OK, but an illegal alien isn't?" – Anonymous Channel 11 blog commenter, on Target's removal of illegal-alien Halloween costume from its shelves after Hispanic protests (KTVT Channel 11, Monday)